( ENSPIRE Feature ) Tribe Builder/Wellness Speaker/Transition Guru Ayris T. Scales Shares The Process of Self-Change
ENSPIRE Contributor: Ayris T. Scales
All my life I’ve felt like I live on the periphery of others. I am always an arm’s length away – visible, yet far enough to still float under the radar, and while not always seen, I know my presence is still felt. This dichotomy of existence has had its pros and cons. I’m probably more comfortable than most riding solo yet bring enough energy to draw others to my flame. Over the years, I morphed into an untethered free spirit with a quiet storm-type command that I know has left much to the interpretation by others.
Dreamy fairy tale weddings and happily ever after love did not fill my head as a young girl. Instead, I yearned for a life that would allow me to see the world, reveal in art, make genuine connections, laugh deeply and often, and most of all leave an impact in communities that I love, for the people I love even more. I’m not sure if it was the intention, fate, or circumstance, but as I now reflect, I can clearly see how my initial vision of this free-spirited existence has actualized, and now even taken on a new vision, manifestations, and metrics. Considering where I started, I absolutely appreciate the educational, professional, and financial gains I’ve amassed over the years. And most recently and most enjoyably, I value the strides I’ve made on my emotional, physical, and even spiritual growth.
Then one night it hit me, that my years of grinding and deploying Jagger-like moves to avoid being “contained”, I placed love and collaboration on the back burner. How can I cultivate my whole self without sowing seeds in my entire garden? So, now I am creating a new chapter in life, one that is so foreign to me that I often don’t even recognize myself and the natural inkling is to revert to the peripheral. But I’ve decided that the peripheral and being a quiet storm is for those who are scared to be seen, heard, and fully present. I’ve also come to recognize that love for self and allowing another to be present, doesn’t have to be mutually exclusive or stifle my freedom or voice – being free does not mean not being anchored.
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